# In Anticipation of the Sequel...G.I. JOE: THE RISE OF COBRA (Blu-ray; Paramount/Hasbro)



## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

[img]http://www.thehdroom.com/images/bluray/large/5221.jpg[/img]*Releasing/Participating Studio(s): Paramount Pictures/Hasbro
Disc/Transfer Information: Region Free (Tested in Region A Configuration); 2.40:1 (Original Aspect Ratio: 2.39:1); 50GB 1080p High Definition Blu-ray Disc
Rating: PG-13
Running Time: 118 Minutes
Tested Audio Track: English DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1
Video Codec: MPEG-4 AVC
Director: Stephen Sommers
Starring Cast: Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, Christopher Eccleston, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Karolina Kurkova, Sienna Miller, Rachel Nichols, Jonathan Pryce, Dennis Quaid, Ray Park, Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans

PLOT ANALYSIS:*

I was never a fan of “G.I. Joe” toys when I was a boy. Don’t know what it was, but I never gravitated towards the line of toys, the games or even the comics and cartoons when they eventually arrived; I realize that it’s pretty much a rite-of-passage for young males to engage in buying everything G.I. Joe, but I was more into collecting Matchbox cars (remember those?), airplane models and even assembling model kits of _Star Trek_’s _USS Enterprise_. As such, I didn’t really understand what was going on here in Stephen “_The Mummy_ and _Van Helsing”_ Sommers’ film adaptation which was supposed to fuse all the known elements of the Hasbro toy franchise, the comic book run and cartoon series – although Hasbro had their toy-empire hand in another feature film by the name of _Battleship_ (also supposedly based on the “game”), the influence here appeared to be more comic-esque than anything else as far as I could tell (after doing some brief research on the book’s history). Be that as it may, I only rented _The Rise of Cobra_ based on the trailers for the sequel, _Retaliation_, which looked uber-exciting with the likes of Dwayne Johnson and Bruce Willis so I could get a better grip on the material and see what it was that I was missing…what I came out with was a headache induced by grossly overproduced CGI sequences, horrific acting and a plot so convoluted and robbed from multiple other stories that I didn’t know whether to cry or scream _”Fraud!”_

Honestly, not since the likes of _John Carpenter’s Escape From L.A._ have I seen such atrocious and obvious mishandling of CGI and special effects manipulation; perhaps it was made even moreso with the high definition 1080p encode, but _Rise of Cobra_’s sets and primary action sequences were riddled with such fake-looking characteristics, I thought I was in fact looking at a video game. What’s perhaps worse, the film is bogged down with a pretty good casting call but which is ultimately wasted with poor performances due to what I perceived as poor script writing – consider that the normally okay Dennis Quaid portrays a pretty big character here, the leader of the “Joes,” General Hawk, but his delivery of dialogue and offputting gesturing throughout makes him a waste. Then, there’s the billboarding techniques that were questionable – out front for the cast notations are actors such as Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (from HBO’s prison show _Oz_ in which he portrayed the deadly and frightening “Adebisi”) and Christopher Eccleston playing “Heavy Duty” and “McCullen/Destro,” respectively, while more recognizable names such as Joseph Gordon-Levitt (who plays “Rex”) and Jonathan Pryce (who plays the U.S. President) are thrown on the back burner in terms of recognition. 

As I said, I didn’t really have a clue as to what was going on here; the action hits you continuously, as Stephen Sommers tends to do in his films (though this didn’t feel, in an overall sense, like a Sommers film at all) and makes you think you’re in the midst of some psychedelic video game throughout – but the acting, plot and coherent sensemaking all seemed to go out the window in my opinion in the midst of it all. Let me see if I can summarize this (and I’m sure many of you out there will be able to correct me on many elements and explain the gaps I will undoubtedly leave): Unlike what Hasbro’s toys and subsequent comic/cartoon run would lead you to believe, the “G.I. Joe” moniker isn’t attached to any one man or “Real American Hero” – it’s actually a reference (in Sommers’ variant) to an elite military unit that’s run out of a location known simply as “The Pit” and is lead by General Hawk (Quaid). The “Joes” as they’re known have access to wildly advanced technology and weaponry, going far beyond what the “standard” military utilizes – this notion, I kept thinking to myself and then pointing out to my dozing wife who ended up falling asleep on this mess of a film, would have actually made a better theme or backdrop for an _Iron Man_ film somehow rather than the disappointment we received in _Iron Man 3_. I could totally picture the “Mandarin” character getting his hands on advanced weaponry like this and then using it against Stark Industries, thus making for a great plot in which our hero must take out Mandarin and his fleet of unstoppable technological forces, yadda…yadda…yadda. Anyway, Sommers’ _G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra_ kicks off with a sequence depicting some well-known (apparently) characters from the other product franchises including one Captain Duke Hauser (a deadbeat Channing Tatum) and his friend/partner “Ripcord” (Marlon Wayans) who are soldiers stationed in Kazakhstan ordered to transport special warheads created by arms manufacturer MARS. This Stark Industries-like operation is headed by a McCullen (_Gone in 60 Seconds’_ Christopher Eccleston), who ends up “turning into” yet another villain recognized by G.I. Joe fanatics as “Destro” at the end of the film, a la Anakin Skywalker “becoming” Darth Vader at the end of _Episode III_. The thick of the plot gets silly and confusing right from the jump, when Duke and Ripcord along with their armada that are transporting the MARS weapons are suddenly attacked by highly technological adversaries that steal the warheads and who are lead by the beautiful Anastasia DeCobray (Sienna Miller) and whom also has a romantic history with Duke. Complete with futuristic ninja-looking assassins and ridiculously advanced weaponry and combat skills, this rogue group end up kicking the snot out of Duke and the U.S. military guys, stealing the warheads and disappearing – but not before an equally-advanced military unit arrives in the thick of the fight to save the soldiers, sporting just-as-advanced weaponry and fighting skills and boasting the name “G.I. Joe” and representing an international special forces unit. 

The “Joes” are made up primarily of Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje’s “Heavy Duty” character, Rachel Nichol’s “Scarlett” character, Ray Park’s “Snake Eyes” ninja character and of course Dennis Quaid’s “General Hawk.” In a rather silly part of the plot, Duke and Ripcord, in exhibiting above-average fighting potential, are allowed by Hawk to train to become G.I. Joes and engage in ridiculous video game-like training scenarios that would entertain no one other than a five-year-old making his way to the local arcade for the very first time. Of course, Wayans’ character falls in love with the gorgeous, fiery redhead known as Scarlett who gives him the cold shoulder to prove she’s a tough-as-nails style chick that “doesn’t need” a big, brawny, six-pack-stomached man to make her happy; meanwhile, we learn that the thieves who stole the advanced warheads are really a secret organization known as “Cobra” and that McCullen is actually working for them, plotting to use the weapons for an utterly stupid reason perhaps never before suggested in an action film even as campy and nonsensical as this one: The opening of the film actually flashes back to a medieval time in France’s history when an “ancestor” of McCullen’s is seen being forced to wear an iron mask (_Fantastic 4_’s Doctor Victor Doom, anyone?) as punishment for some kind of revolt; now, in present day, McCullen wants to “pay back the French” for this disgrace by launching these weapons at the Eiffel Tower and at Paris itself…what?! Well, of course, he wants to destroy _all_ the world, but let’s begin with France, shall we?

So, of course the plan becomes this: Stop McCullen and Cobra before this can be achieved. But not so easy, right? The Joes are fighting quite the formidable force, with the almost unstoppable ninja assassin known as Storm Shadow (Byung-hun Lee), the now brainwashed and technologically advanced Ana (Sienna Miller) not to mention the sick, psychotic scientist known as “Rex” (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) who is responsible for turning McCullen’s army into fearless warriors based on a chemical that makes them impervious even to the bite of a deadly King Cobra. As I said, all this got way too convoluted and video game/comic book like for my tastes, and I started to lose interest after awhile; Sommers attempts to explain the connections between certain characters here too, beginning with flashback sequences that suggest Duke and Ana were once sweethearts who were supposed to be married but which went bad when Duke was supposed to look after Ana’s brother Rex, another American soldier going to war with Duke, but who fails to do so when Rex is exposed to the “Cobra” organization at some point and joins their league when he’s disfigured somehow from a chemical reaction explosion (I don’t know; something along the lines of Anakin Skywalker, once again, being “disfigured” in the fight against Obi Wan?). Apparently, Ana was also somehow “taken in” and brainwashed by the Cobras, now made into a fearless, powerful fighting machine yielding incredible powers and weapons at her reach. Then, there’s the connection between the two “super ninjas” on each side – Cobra’s “Storm Shadow” and G.I. Joes’ silent, mysterious “Snake Eyes.” Apparently, also suggested via flashback sequences, in their youth these two boys were mortal enemies, fighting from day one when “Snake Eyes” broke into a home to get some food because he was starving and “Storm Shadow” not liking the idea which lead to them engaging in martial arts battles that left them both bloodied and war-torn; Gerald Okamura portrays the “Hard Master” in these flashback scenes, teaching young “Snake Eyes” to become an even more powerful warrior than “Storm Shadow” was. When “Storm Shadow” interprets a later act by “Snake Eyes” as betrayal, he kills the Master and now has a new lifelong enemy in the enraged “Snake Eyes.” Indeed, one of these powerful super ninjas is now working with the Cobra group while the other has taken up the “righteous” path and joined with the Joes.

The trailers for _Rise of Cobra_ depicting the soldiers utilizing futuristic iron suits and supercharged weaponry that allows them to joust around incredibly fast are realized in the feature film during a sequence in which the Joes are desperately trying to save Paris from the oncoming attack by Cobra: The Joes have developed a specialized metal suit (a la “Iron Man”) that allows for incredibly fast motion and propulsion, and which include lots of onboard weaponry. Both Duke and Ripcord don these suits during the Paris sequence, smashing through cars and traffic while chasing down Cobra and their subordinates, who are on their way to fire the advanced MARS warheads at the Eiffel Tower. The sequence, while kinetic and dripping with eye-popping action, came off ultimately as silly and video game-like, Wayans and Tatum flying, dropping and spinning around oncoming Paris traffic in slow-to-high-motion shots by Sommers that really made the special effects work here feel shoddy (funny notation: I found the same sloppy CGI work to coat Sommers’ _Mummy_ remake). While the Joes are attempting to stop the bad guys, they are meanwhile killing dozens upon dozens of people in the streets of Paris as cars and buses are blowing up and being thrown about all around them. Ultimately, the group saves the city – but not the iconic tower, as we witness one of Cobra’s warheads strike it and deliver its green absorption element that brings the entire structure down and crashing into the water and traffic below. 

The concluding frames of _G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra_ were completely lost on me as the action switches from unrealistic displays of technology on the streets of Paris to an underwater “kingdom” run by McCullen and MARS and which features all kinds of advanced attack subs and other weapons; the whole thing was childish and reminded me of, say, _Seaquest_ meets _X-Men_. The special effects work here was especially cheesy and amateurish, making these underwater sets look even sillier than intended – this perhaps would have worked for an _Aqua Man_ feature film set, but not here. The Joes trace Cobra back to this underwater lair, existing somewhere deep under the Polar Ice Cap, where the mysterious “Doctor” (Gordon-Levitt) has plans to take over the Cobra organization and immobilize McCullen, turning him into the hideously disfigured “Destro” villain while also exposing himself to be Ana’s brother to a shocked Duke, who eventually is captured and restrained by the evil Cobra. 

I didn’t like this film; I realize I am about five years late in seeing and reporting on it here, and I wouldn’t have even rented it weren’t for the exciting-looking trailers for the sequel which caught my attention immediately…but this was nonsense in my opinion, riddled with horrible acting, poor writing and special effects work that embarrasses even Sommers’ own _Mummy_. Perhaps it’s because I never grew up on a diet of G.I. Joe, but this one just went right over my head, nearly every concept lost on me. The only saving grace, as I saw it, were the moments when “Snake Eyes” enters into a death match – super ninja vs. super ninja – with his dire lifelong enemy from his youth during one of the closing scenes (you know who wins that one…don’t you?) as well as when the gorgeous eye candy that is Ana (Sienna Miller) eventually comes to realize that she’s been on the wrong side with the Cobras and switches gears to come back into Duke’s life and assist the Joes (though _that_ one's a stretch in every sense of the word). 

I do hope the sequel fares better…

[img]http://www.recipeapart.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/gi_joe_the_rise_of_cobra_screenshot_1.jpg[/img]*VIDEO QUALITY ANALYSIS: HOW DID THE DISC LOOK?*

Take a deep breath….okay….here goes….

Because of the ridiculous amounts of CGI and candy-coated special effects work on display here – nearly from beginning to end, literally – the Blu-ray transfer of _Rise of Cobra_ comes off looking like a surreal video game, even on a non-LCD display like mine (something of a feat in it of itself). Characters are ripe with heavy doses of detail-laden elements – such as hair follicles or wet edges of hairlines where sweat is appearing – while a keen sense of ultra-cleanliness inundates the transfer from one frame to the next. Paramount’s 2.40:1 imagery in the 1080p encode is terrifically bursting with high def-like detail, explosive contrast and overall characteristics that suggest non-live-action setpieces: Indeed, as I stressed, the film actually _looks_ video-like without any manipulation of frame interpolation algorithms, giving the general exhibition a game-esque feel that I am sure was intentional on behalf of filmmaker Sommers. 














[img]http://i2.listal.com/image/800518/600full-g.i.-joe%3A-the-rise-of-cobra-screenshot.jpg[/img]*AUDIO QUALITY ANALYSIS: HOW DID THE DISC SOUND?*

As I prepared for an all-out assault on my senses when the DTS-HD Master Audio track began accompanying the visuals of _G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra_, I couldn’t believe how disappointed I became as scene after scene elapsed: This mix was actually somewhat _hushed_ in overall dynamic output at least to my ears, and I simply couldn’t account for it…was it my equipment? No. Was it my maybe reduced master volume level that I didn’t check? No; levels were actually running hotter than usual. Was it a budgetary problem with this title…or something having to do with the studio? I don’t suspect so. What went wrong?

From the first action sequence onward, the Master Audio track here seemed to be reserved a bit, as if a blanket of some kind were covering my speakers; if this were a Dolby track of some variant, I would have sworn the dynamic compression night mode was engaged – that’s how obvious the treatment was. I just couldn’t get immersed in this track; there were plenty of surround usage examples but nothing really stood out or shook my room to its core – likewise, the overall volume output of the track wasn’t bombastic whatsoever, strangely, and I felt as though I could have kept raising the volume and raising the volume to compensate with no real level of satisfaction coming at any point…

There’s no other way I could describe the experience I had with this track; it was on the low output side, disappointing and ultimately unbecoming of a mix supposed to accompany a silly action title like this. 

Again – I do hope the sequel fares better on Blu-ray as well. 

*FINAL THOUGHTS:*

I _know_ there’s gotta be more than a few ‘Shacksters out there who are _Joe_ fans; if you feel as I did about this first one, or if you disagree and loved it – or even if you’d like to discuss the upcoming sequel, I’d be delighted to hear from you! As for me personally, I won't be losing any sleep never seeing this one again...


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## ericzim (Jun 24, 2012)

Thanks for the heads up on this one Osage. I have been holding off on buying the first one as I enjoyed it very much at the theater but knowing Hollywood it would release the second movie and I would buy the complete set when it gets released. Hopefully the package will have an improved kung-fu grip.


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## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

ericzim said:


> Thanks for the heads up on this one Osage. I have been holding off on buying the first one as I enjoyed it very much at the theater but knowing Hollywood it would release the second movie and I would buy the complete set when it gets released. Hopefully the package will have an improved kung-fu grip.


Hello Eric and hope you and your family had a great Fourth weekend -- and as always thank you for responding!

Yes, I didn't really care for this; difficult to describe, but I thought it played like a silly video game nearly from beginning to end. I thought even normally decent leads from the likes of Quaid were wasted here and ill-acted. I do want to like the sequel though just because of who's in it -- so we'll have to see...:T


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## ericzim (Jun 24, 2012)

When this one came out at the theater, all the dads and gramps left the grams, wives and kids at home to see it. We thought it was a hoot at the theater. I noticed there are a few places to order early releases for the sequel. I missed "Retaliation" at the theater when it came out, had that whole quadruple bypass thing happen in April.:woohoo:


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## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

I suppose this is one of those rare moments when you and I agree to disagree; while I am indeed looking forward to the sequel due to its starpower marquee value, I didn't care for _Rise of Cobra_...of course, as I mentioned, this may have a lot to do with the fact that I was not smitten with "G.I. Joe" collateral when I was a kid...:huh:


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## ericzim (Jun 24, 2012)

I had the whole GI-Joe setup back in the 60's. My fondest memories are Joe kickin' the doodoo out of Barbie's Ken (My little sisters) and repeating that scenario over and over. Ahh, good times.


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## ericzim (Jun 24, 2012)

Today I am going to the local media exchange, I should be able to find a used copy of the first movie there on Blu-ray for cheap. If I can find it I will watch it tonight and tell you what I think of the transfer to B-ray. The theater experience having long since passed, I will have to keep an open mind about it after reading your review and remembering how much fun the theater experience was.


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## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

ericzim said:


> I had the whole GI-Joe setup back in the 60's. My fondest memories are Joe kickin' the doodoo out of Barbie's Ken (My little sisters) and repeating that scenario over and over. Ahh, good times.


:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:


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## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

ericzim said:


> Today I am going to the local media exchange, I should be able to find a used copy of the first movie there on Blu-ray for cheap. If I can find it I will watch it tonight and tell you what I think of the transfer to B-ray. The theater experience having long since passed, I will have to keep an open mind about it after reading your review and remembering how much fun the theater experience was.


Sounds good, Eric; looking forward to your sentiments...

Tomorrow, I will have my review of _The Host_ on Blu-ray up...:T


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## ericzim (Jun 24, 2012)

Just finished watching Rise of Cobra and I have to admit the audio was very anemic compared to what I remembered from the theater. So Osage, your summation was right on the money. I wonder who was responsible for the final sign-off Blu-ray release, Paramount or Hasbro. Either way I am glad I am only out 3 bucks. :spend:


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## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

ericzim said:


> Just finished watching Rise of Cobra and I have to admit the audio was very anemic compared to what I remembered from the theater. So Osage, your summation was right on the money. I wonder who was responsible for the final sign-off Blu-ray release, Paramount or Hasbro. Either way I am glad I am only out 3 bucks. :spend:


Thank you so much for confirming what I experienced with this title, Eric; wow -- you went out and got this pretty quick, huh? Yeah, I don't think it's personally worth more than three bucks...especially given the nature of the audio track; I'm not quite sure what went wrong here, but it was far from bombastic in terms of sheer energy and dynamics...and given the nature of the material it's supporting, this was a head-scratcher to me...

What did you think of the video quality? You watched the entire presentation from start to finish just now?


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## ericzim (Jun 24, 2012)

Osage_Winter said:


> Sounds good, Eric; looking forward to your sentiments...
> 
> Tomorrow, I will have my review of _The Host_ on Blu-ray up...:T


Wonderful, another one we can compare notes on.


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## ericzim (Jun 24, 2012)

Osage_Winter said:


> Thank you so much for confirming what I experienced with this title, Eric; wow -- you went out and got this pretty quick, huh? Yeah, I don't think it's personally worth more than three bucks...especially given the nature of the audio track; I'm not quite sure what went wrong here, but it was far from bombastic in terms of sheer energy and dynamics...and given the nature of the material it's supporting, this was a head-scratcher to me...
> 
> What did you think of the video quality? You watched the entire presentation from start to finish just now?


Watched it with the wife as she didn't get to see it. She was confused at times by the story line, always reverting backwards on the time line. She didn't care for it. The video transfer to me was as bad as the audio at times especially what was supposed to be the under water scenes, funny that I don't remember the CGI video looking so compressed at the theater, this is one of those occasions where the Blu-ray transfer did not do the theater presentation justice. You didn't mention it but did you notice the grainy video at the polar ice cap right before the team went on the snow mobiles? Every time the scene switched from light to dark I noticed it as well.


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## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

ericzim said:


> Wonderful, another one we can compare notes on.


You've seen it already -- on home video of some kind, I mean? :blink:


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## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

ericzim said:


> Watched it with the wife as she didn't get to see it. She was confused at times by the story line, always reverting backwards on the time line. She didn't care for it.


Same here with my ball-and-chain -- I mean, uhh, missus....



> The video transfer to me was as bad as the audio at times especially what was supposed to be the under water scenes, funny that I don't remember the CGI video looking so compressed at the theater, this is one of those occasions where the Blu-ray transfer did not do the theater presentation justice.


Interesting to me that you found the video disappointing; I didn't think it was disappointing, per se, based on the fact that I think Sommers was going for a video game-like look here, but what did bother me was the horrendously fake-looking CGI, reminding me very much, as I pointed out in the review, of Carpenter's _Escape From L.A._ where you couldn't get any more fake-looking effects if you pulled them out of a 10th grader's iPhone. Still, I thought the video transfer rendered all this in a cartoony way -- something I always liked about LCD performance -- and the images downright popped on my rear projection display. 



> You didn't mention it but did you notice the grainy video at the polar ice cap right before the team went on the snow mobiles? Every time the scene switched from light to dark I noticed it as well.


You know something, I didn't notice that grain element -- I probably looked right past it because I was so uninterested at that point; I will definitely take your word for it though. :T

It was probably something that just went wrong with the encoding or was some kind of film element issue such as the scene in _Superman Returns_ when Lex Luthor (Kevin Spacey) is "stealing" the meteorite from the museum to make Kryptonite and the sequence breaks up into a horrendously noisy, staticky mess (this happened on EVERY format this title came out on and which I sampled, DVD, HD DVD and Blu-ray) -- or that sequence in _Spider-Man 3_ in which MJ (Kirsten Dunst) comes to Harry's (James Franco) city penthouse to make omelets together and just before she arrives there's an aerial shot of his building that is absolutely riddled with noise, twitchy video elements and abnormalities around the outlines of the building and surrounding buildings in the frame. I'm suspecting this may be what _G.I. Joe_ suffered from in certain parts like the one you mentioned...


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## ericzim (Jun 24, 2012)

Osage_Winter said:


> You've seen it already -- on home video of some kind, I mean? :blink:


Digital download actually and I haven't had a chance to watch it yet as the wife and I like to watch AGT from 8 until 10 on Tuesday evening and now a special 2 hours tomorrow night that will also cut into movie watching. I plan on viewing the Host before I read your review this time around.


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## Osage_Winter (Apr 8, 2010)

I see; well, I for one don't subscribe to the whole "digital download" thing, instead preferring the lossless audio of the Blu-rays (or "standard" audio tracks on DVDs) as well as the uncompressed video...at any rate, I will have the review of _The Host_ up shortly and will hopefully have my thoughts on _Dead Man Down_ up by tomorrow. Hopefully, we'll find similar elements that we either liked or didn't like when discussing _The Host_...:T


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