# Sneaking in the good stuff



## blitzer (Mar 5, 2010)

Most of my audio system has quietly just magically appeared in the rack. Speakers have gradually grown bigger over the years. I have even moved the equipment into the back room totally out of site. 

My wife is truly happy listening to her iPhone speaker :unbelievable:. She can go from listening to her iPhone to listening to the big system and not blink. She truly just hears music and not the quality of it(or something like that).

If you are one of those audiophiles or HT enthusiasts that have wives(or husbands) that don't value the investment - how have you grown your system? What methods have you used to upgrade? Any good stories?


----------



## chashint (Jan 12, 2011)

I know plenty of people that feel exactly like your wife when it comes to sound.
They install a huge screen along with an expensive projector and powered theater seating and then balk at spending a penny on the audio system.
I don't really get it, but everyone has their own priorities. 

I never have to hide any purchases.
I research it and pick two or three options I will be satisfied with, inform Mrs. chashint that I want it and the current prices. Then I wait for the price to fall on one of them and when it does I buy it. 
Everyone remains happy and we both enjoy the toys.


----------



## blitzer (Mar 5, 2010)

Yeah - same with me. None of my non-audiophile friends were impressed with my system's audio quality, unless I made their ears ring with the subwoofer. When I got the projector and big screen I became a neighborhood legend. I guess people these days are tuned to appreciate visual above auditory stimulus. 

I am jealous that you both enjoy the hobby to similar levels. 

I wonder how may people have their own hidden bank accounts or slush money for upgrades.


----------



## Peter Loeser (Aug 11, 2012)

It's not unusual for people to ask me to recommend a complete audio system (receiver, 5 or more speakers, a subwoofer) priced at about 25%-50% of the cost of their display. With _only_ a 60" display, I think my home theater is a major disappointment to most people who experience it. Sadly, very few even recognize the benefit of my sound system, so trying to impress them with it or justify the cost to them is pointless. But then, I don't see any value in things like designer clothes.

Thankfully I am blessed to have a dedicated HT room in our current home and the freedom to do pretty much whatever I want to it and in it. My wife does not care too much about premium audio (also content listening to music through her iPhone speaker :blink, but I think she has come to appreciate it a bit more as it gives us a good cinema experience at home. Time and funding are my only limiting factors. I try to minimize the financial impact of a new purchase by selling the component it will replace. For more expensive items, I count on my wife to inject some practicality into the decision-making process. She is very accommodating and usually says either "go for it" or "do we have the money?". She will definitely object when she feels the need. I also try to encourage her to spend money on herself, even if it's stuff I think is pointless.


----------



## tonyvdb (Sep 5, 2007)

my girlfriend has said many times that I can get whatever I want within reason as long as she can get what she wants. She appreciates quality sound and video and understands that electronics need upgrading every so often in order to keep up with technology.


----------



## Tonto (Jun 30, 2007)

My purchaces are few & far between. My wife being disabled means we live on my income which has to accomodate her medical bills. It is a challenge but God blesses us well. Getting close to finishing my theater soon...lord willin!!! :T


----------



## 86eldel68-deactivated (Nov 30, 2010)

> If you are one of those audiophiles or HT enthusiasts that have wives(or husbands) that don't value the investment - how have you grown your system?


My wife and I have a joint account for common expenses, but the rest of each of our incomes is each of ours to spend and/or save as we wish.

When my HT was in the main floor family room, we compromised on what was acceptable in that space (and, IMO, my wife was quite reasonable). 

When the HT got moved to the newly-finished basement, I pretty much had free reign, limited only by how much of my own money I want to spend. :bigsmile:


----------



## pdxrealtor (Jun 30, 2013)

My wife is pretty cool about things, in fact, I buy what I want almost when I want. And, I will not hide a dime from her. 

However, there's always a tradeoff. That is all I will say.


----------



## |Tch0rT| (May 2, 2013)

I buy stuff. It appears. I don't hide how much I spend however I don't say unless asked. After nearly 10 years of being married my wife doesn't usually ask questions anymore as long as the bills are paid. The living room is mine, she gets the rest of the house. It works quite well.


----------



## brwsaw (Feb 19, 2014)

When the sound/realism impresses your wife the rest is easy.


----------



## Dwight Angus (Dec 17, 2007)

My wife is very supportive when HT investments are needed. There is a limit to her tolerance however & I am reminded when suggesting we purchase the next HT upgrade that our house also needs upgrades. Its always a trade off & I find I have to ration funds to satisfy many needs.


----------



## rab-byte (Feb 1, 2011)

Dwight Angus said:


> My wife is very supportive when HT investments are needed. There is a limit to her tolerance however & I am reminded when suggesting we purchase the next HT upgrade that our house also needs upgrades. Its always a trade off & I find I have to ration funds to satisfy many needs.


Tell me about it!
My wife's a saint. She has always had one rule for our living room; it can't look like a "spaceship". I can have my toys as long as the room doesn't look like a spaceship. 

She even tolerates the electrostatics!

We recently moved and she quit her job to go back to school. Now we're single income and stretching our budgets for the next 3 years. I've got that marantz 7701 sitting, taunting, me and I can't get the power amp for it right now. 

You're house needs upgrades; we need to move AGAIN because our current apartment is falling apart. So I'm right there with you.


----------



## chashint (Jan 12, 2011)

My wife decided to "retire" about 3 months after the house was paid off (if I knew she was going to do that I would have refinanced the stupid thing instead, oh well I digress) so we have been a single income household for 3-4 years and I have to be much more conservative with the number of toys I select compared to when she was working.
Seems like anything I want these days costs many 100's and usually $1000's.


----------



## Glen B (Jun 11, 2013)

After 32 years of marriage, my purchase of audio gear is no longer an issue with my wife. I don't keep my purchases secret. The bills are paid, and she gets treated to a vacation or two every year, so what is there to complain about ?


----------



## buildsafire (Nov 10, 2013)

My wife is very practical, and can be very frugal. I appreciate those qualities about her... most of the time. I am disabled and so my income is limited to SSD, and what I earn from my stereo/guitar repair business. So, we don't have a lot of money... but we work together on these things. I have snuck equipment in in the past, and paid mightily for it (as I should have).
Now, when there's a need, I sit my wife down and explain all the factors, etc... and see what happens. If there's stuff to buy (even if she doesn't fully understand why) we make a budget and plan it out. It works well.


----------



## A/V (Feb 5, 2014)

As long as it doesn't hurt the budget too much and I have saved the cash, it's no problem. It always helps if you are able to explain things in a way that makes the upgrade seem absolutely necessary. Well chosen words always help.


----------



## blitzer (Mar 5, 2010)

Wow, sounds like everyone here has worked out a pretty good understanding with their significant others. I have not been able to do that as well as you as my wife just thinks it's a waste of time and only listens to music when working out or at parties. I have managed to get to my current setup over 15 years and am happy with it. Well, maybe just one more thing.


----------



## B- one (Jan 13, 2013)

My new amps will be here Monday! Are you getting the subs? Very nice offer of delivery for gas money! As I said they would have been mine 2 weeks earlier, but when the house payment is gone who knows I'm sure another Velodyne max eq 15 would be good enough. Good luck if you get those subs you may have to send your other half shopping to sneak them inside.


----------



## Glen B (Jun 11, 2013)

blitzer said:


> Wow, sounds like everyone here has worked out a pretty good understanding with their significant others. I have not been able to do that as well as you as my wife just thinks it's a waste of time and only listens to music when working out or at parties.


If my wife thought like that, I would consider it disrespectful, to tell me that my pasttime is a waste of time. If you were to tell your wife that one of her favorite things to do was a waste of time, she would probably be offended. Part of marriage or a committed relationship is being respectful, tolerant and supportive of each other.


----------



## blitzer (Mar 5, 2010)

Glen B said:


> If my wife thought like that, I would consider it disrespectful, to tell me that my pasttime is a waste of time. If you were to tell your wife that one of her favorite things to do was a waste of time, she would probably be offended. Part of marriage or a committed relationship is being respectful, tolerant and supportive of each other.


LOL. My audio/video fetish has not driven us to counseling or anything. I may need counseling, but our marriage is great.

So, how do I explain this? She is respectful and supportive. She is just not interested in sound quality/volume/etc. So, if the tables were turned - if her hobby was collecting expensive porcelain dolls I would be supportive, but if she came to me and said, hey - there is a 200 pound porcelain doll that will take over the the living room and it only costs $2999.99. I could imagine myself saying - hey, that looks great, but here is a nice 70 pound doll that looks almost as good and does not take up so much space and is much cheaper. I would do it if it truly made her happy, but otherwise the bigger doll would be a hard sell for me. It is kind-of the same situation with audio/video and me. She doesn't understand why I need speakers as large as a coffin. Actually, neither do my friends for that matter. 

I am assuming many audiophiles don't have significant others that have the same hobby have this similar challenge.

All that said, I have found a way over the last 14 years to get the stereo that I am very happy with and cannot complain. I am just lucky to have somewhat of a man cave to tuck this stuff in. It's just most of the time it has been unspoken how much some of this stuff costs. I have never robbed the piggy bank or anything like that and it has never affected our budget. I just have to say it has been a journey. I bought almost everything second hand and have actually been able to make a buck or two and trade up in the sweet spot of the depreciation curve of speakers.

I just wanted to hear about other people challenges in their Journey to audio/video nirvana.


----------



## blitzer (Mar 5, 2010)

B- one said:


> My new amps will be here Monday! Are you getting the subs? Very nice offer of delivery for gas money! As I said they would have been mine 2 weeks earlier, but when the house payment is gone who knows I'm sure another Velodyne max eq 15 would be good enough. Good luck if you get those subs you may have to send your other half shopping to sneak them inside.


No kidding, I am actually talking with the wife about purchasing these SVS subs :unbelievable:. Because they actually do weight about 300 or so pounds and do take up a ton of room. Maybe I'll get the wife a porcelin doll or something .


----------



## ALMFamily (Oct 19, 2011)

blitzer said:


> LOL. My audio/video fetish has not driven us to counseling or anything. I may need counseling, but our marriage is great.
> 
> So, how do I explain this? She is respectful and supportive. She is just not interested in sound quality/volume/etc. So, if the tables were turned - if her hobby was collecting expensive porcelain dolls I would be supportive, but if she came to me and said, hey - there is a 200 pound porcelain doll that will take over the the living room and it only costs $2999.99. I could imagine myself saying - hey, that looks great, but here is a nice 70 pound doll that looks almost as good and does not take up so much space and is much cheaper. I would do it if it truly made her happy, but otherwise the bigger doll would be a hard sell for me. It is kind-of the same situation with audio/video and me. She doesn't understand why I need speakers as large as a coffin. Actually, neither do my friends for that matter.
> 
> ...


I know exactly what you are talking about Brent - my wife and kids do not really care about sound quality at all. For them, the whole experience is the video on the screen that I built and the room I put together. They do not care one whit about where they sit in the room - as long as they can see the screen they are good. My friends are the same way - I have a group that I do a movie night with at least once a month, and, while they enjoy the sound, I do not think they really get into it like I do. When we got together this last time, we watched Gravity. I was mesmerized by the use of the front channels in the opening sequence with the exchanges between mission control and the shuttle. The rest of them could not have cared less. 

I have also followed the same equipment path - pretty much all the equipment I have was either used or is b-stock. It has been a great way to go as I was patient and found some great pieces for very affordable prices which allowed me some freedom in making the room what it has become. I was also lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time in a couple instances - the Seaton speakers being the most recent.


----------

